daily journal

forty one.

Here’s the thing. I believe in angels. I don’t know about you… but I do, especially after tonight. 

I legitimately snapped my ankle falling down the stairs. I heard the snap, I immediately dropped, falling the other few stairs and crashed into my record cabinet. Jon was up and by my side it seemed like the instant I landed. My whole foot was laying flat on its side and Jon had already made his way up the stairs to grab me some clothes and get Edyn in the car to rush me to the doctor and he yelled from upstairs and asked me if I could move it. I cried back “no way in HELL”. I’ve had broken bones before so I was cautiously trying to gage the pain to know for sure but I knew it that instant… “it’s broken”, and I was positive. But then I felt the need to try… “just try to move it a little”, I thought. So I did and I felt another pop and then the pain was gone, instantly. I assumed once the adrenaline let up there would be some residual pain but I’m not even joking when I say there’s no way, with the way I fell, the way it looked and the pain I was experiencing that my ankle could somehow NOT be broken unless there was some divine intervention.

That was intense. Jon and I just sat on the floor laughing and crying at the same time because WHAT THE HECK JUST HAPPENED??

Oh my lands. Anyways- in other news, I got to snuggle a little baby today at work so whatever bad things happened today don’t really count because when you hold little babies, their magic little infant dust makes you only remember the good.

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Also- this picture breaks my heart and mends it and breaks it again and then it just fills up so full that it bursts. This picture EXACTLY sums up what I see when I look at them. When he is there, she is safe. WE (her and I) are safe because he loves us that much. What a guy I tricked into loving me but my gosh, I wouldn’t give either of these two up for the whole universe.

Goodnight everyone. Fall asleep tonight thinking about someone you love, whomever that may be, and knowing that whomever you and are wherever you may be… you are loved, too.

P.S. that residual pain I mentioned earlier… it’s real. But I’ll take that over a broken bone ANY DAY.

 

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daily journal

forty.

What a day.

After spending the weekend curled up in a dark pit called “food poisoning hell”, I finally felt like I might sort of make it out alive today. And thank the good Lord, too, because we had plans to have a belated birthday/Memorial Day celebration with my Dad.

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I still probably should have held off on eating anything too heavy but when Dad makes his famous pulled pork sandwiches, ya just don’t say no. And then after swimming and laying out (exhausting work, really), we were all pretty tuckered out by the time we headed home. And not to mention sunburnt to a crisp.

But… I have this problem listening to reason and when everything says “don’t eat anymore food tonight” I say…”let’s stop at taco time!”

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And then I had to take a nap on the couch for an hour or I’d be back worshiping the porcelain throne. And now I’ve been awake from said nap for about an hour now and I’m ready to go to bed.

Being out in the sun all day, eating pork sandwiches and crisp bean burritos after a bout of food poisoning… not the smartest move I’ve ever made. I’ll admit that.

Goodnight!

daily journal

thirty nine.

If you pay attention to dates related to this blog, you will see there was no post yesterday. Why, you ask? FOOD POISONING.

Ho-ly tolitos.

That crap is straight from the devil.

Anyways. After sleeping most of today I am STARVING, and still tired. IMG_0605

Popcorn, Scandal, and back to bed.

Goodnight everyone.

daily journal

thirty eight.

Its Friday. That means one of two things:

1. I exist out in the real world.

2. I stay on my couch watching Scandal until Tuesday morning when I go back to work.

I have yet to decide which of these I will choose  but the popular vote is for the latter.

Gotta get back, Fitz told Mellie he wants a divorce so obviously this requires my undivided attention.

Goodnight!

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daily journal

thirty seven.

We are officially on summer break. So to celebrate, we went to a park after I was finished with work.

My life is pretty dang good, I’ll tell ya. But that’s the thing about this whole depression nonsense.. it can turn something great into something dark and all of the sudden you’re staring blankly at a piece of gravel trying to keep from wanting to curl up under the nearest bush and hide there forever.

But, and this “but” comes with a little hint of adolescence, but swinging has a way of putting new air into my lungs and helping me clear away some of the darkness and just find a way to close my eyes and take deep breaths while the sun is shining on my skin. It’s always been relaxing. It’s always been a source of comfort.

Oh and word to the wise, if you’re going to try this whole swinging thing, don’t take pictures while up in the air because there’s a possiblity you could lose balance and end up flailing like a fruitcake, but only a little. 🙂 goodnight everyone, we’re all in this life together, don’t forget that.

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daily journal

thirty six.

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It’s almost summer break! I am NOT one of those moms who dread summer break and can’t wait until their kids get back to school.

Nope. I actually dread the school year because I’m slightly attached to her and I don’t like only being able to see her for two hours out of the day (between school and bed time). By slightly, I mean entirely.

One of my main goals with writing this daily journal was to keep my juices flowing so as to hopefully keep another writers block at bay. But honestly, so far it’s been rushing to make sure I get an entry in before bed or before we start a movie night or something, and I end up not really utilizing the time to create anything with my words. But… writing is writing and promised myself I would.

Now if only I could get back to writing the book…

Goodnight everyone! Remember you are loved, you are important, you are worth it. Kick A tomorrow.

 

daily journal

thirty five.

The clomid migraines are back. Wahh.

And my little care taker child did her best to make me feel better (again) by making me a “snack”. Truly, she knows me. Food is the way to my heart.

Unfortunately, she hasn’t quite mastered the cleaning up part. IMG_0475IMG_0483

and yes, that is a coffee mug full of cherry tomatoes and left over birthday cake drizzled with chocolate syrup. The creativity! (Do not recommend that combination).

Night guys.

daily journal

thirty four.

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I guess today was like any old Monday. Work, home, clean, work out, TV and couch lounging (currently).

Edyn woke up with a stomach ache, and seeing as schools out in 3 days, I figured it couldn’t hurt if I let her stay with me at work for the day.

I actually really love those days. Not that she’s sick, obviously, but just being with her and the fact that I work at a place that allows me to bring her with me whenever I need.

We’ve been looking for a new tv series and I believe we’ve found it! SCANDAL. I’m officially on the train.

Gotta go watch more. Goodnight!

daily journal · trailer reno

thirty two.

We worked on the trailer ALL DAY today and it’s still nowhere close to being finished. I got most of the cabinets painted, but it turns out there was a huge leak (multiple leaks) in the ceiling so we had to tear that down, reframe it, seal it, etc. etc.

it also turns out, which I found out by accident, there’s a bunch of water damage to the floor. I just stepped out to see what Edyn was doing and sunk in about an inch or so.

So it’s going to be a lot more work than expected, but it’s still such a fun project to be doing as a family. This is what Jon and I love to do, and we’ve always talked about renovating as a hobby.

So we’ll take it step by step and hopefully, before too long, we’ll be out on the road with it, soaking up the summer. IMG_0350

Oh, p.s. It’s my birthday tomorrow!

g’night everyone!