Gosh, so much is happening and not happening all at the same time. It’s hard to keep track of where my head is these days because I swear I will be in two separate but complete thoughts at the exact same moment and when my eyes start to feel dry and I blink my way out of wherever I was, I think to myself, “well that was weird.”
If you know me, it’s not a huge surprise that Jon and I have been trying to expand the number of children in our household for some time, and if you know that you must also know how hard it’s been (but that’s stating the obvious when it comes to infertility, right?)
It still feels weird to say ‘infertility’.
Anyways, I started on this pill today that is supposed to give your baby making chances a little kick in the rear — so here’s hoping.
All I can think about in this moment, though, is driving home, windows open, candles lit, doodling or working on my book, just breathing a little – trying to find some solid ground to just be.
I love my home and my family and I’m so abundantly blessed in this life and all of this frustration that comes with infertility is countered by the unbelievable wonder that is the daughter I have already been given.
(We just make cute kids and I need to add to the litter, ya know?)